His eponymous coils aren’t the only thing that created a buzz and a sizzle! So he’s been dead since 1943. Minor detail. Nikola Tesla was one helluva hot ticket in his time and no doubt he was well aware of it, too. No matter what the fashion of the day, guys just don’t strike a pose like the one in the accompanying photo unless they know they have got it goin’ awwn.

Now don’t let that seductive, come-hither stare fool you. He’s not playing coy, no matter what you think those bedroom eyes might be suggesting, so stay in your seat and keep your hands to yourself. An unapologetic germaphobe, the last thing in the world he would have wanted was a kiss! Yuck!

But he was quite the Mr. Smarty-pants, even if a lot of his science “buddies” considered him and his ideas more than a wee bit daft (that’s a euphemism for “crackpot”). So he said he could split the Earth in two and shoot down airplanes with death rays. Who hasn’t heard the rest of the boys at the local talking themselves up with such tripe now and again? Puh-leeze! Thing is, this Tesla guy could actually do it. Go ahead and google “HAARP”. Pretty impressive, huh?

Hard to believe he had a reputation for not getting along with his contemporaries – then again, one of the Negative Nellies was none other than Thomas Edison himself – a guy who wasn’t exactly going to win any congeniality prizes of his own. Sounds a bit like sour grapes, if you ask me. Can’t imagine it would feel too great to be Mr. Big Time Inventor and have some young upstart constantly offering suggestions on how to improve your stuff (and having those suggestions turn out to be good ones; haha, in your face, Tommy!)

Nikky-boy did enjoy the good life, however, and had a regular table at the Waldorf-Astoria. So here’s this dapper dude who would take you out for a grand meal, polish your silverware about twelve times with his requisite eighteen napkins, load you up with gin cobblers and fascinating conversation, and then send you home with your virtue intact. Gentleman? or weirdo? Oh, who cares! Just relax and sip your cocktail like a good girl – especially if you have any designs on wanting to catch a glimpse of seeing his fabulous lab. And trust me, I think you do. Maybe he’ll read you one of his poems by the light of one of his plasma spheres. Yep, he liked to write in his spare time.

Just try not to get too attached. He’s not for you. Don’t take it personally. Marriage just isn’t his bag, baby. He’s the classic loner. The mad genius. And he’s lousy with money. And a workaholic who never calls…

But that just makes you want him all the more, doesn’t it?