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A Game Theoretic Approach to the Toilet Seat Problem

– FROM THE ARCHIVES – The toilet seat problem has been the subject of much controversey. In this paper we consider a simplified model of the toilet seat problem. We shall show that for this model there is an inherent conflict of interest which can be resolved by a equity solution. Consider a bathroom with one omnipurpose toilet (also known as a WC) which is used for two toilet operations which we shall designate as #1 and #2. The toilet has an attachment which we shall refer to as the seat (but see remark 1 below) which may be in…

LUCY’S BONES FROM AFAR

Gracile Australopithecus: November 1974 Offered in atonement these few small bones meant nothing but salvation: a kind of anthropological grace held in a trembling hand. Mired in a bed of river dust pillowed between rocks and sheets of clay ancestral arthropods led us on. Before the fire we danced and drank and repeated the music each rote word a triumph in our mind each note ingrained. Under the brilliant carpet of heaven deep in the musk of canvas sweat and kerosene we leaped with the flame our shadows racing home our footprints close behind.

WEATHER IS NOT A PEST

With summer past, I remember the flies and other assorted citizens of bugdom at my house. Some were silent like models of mathematical motion, and some buzzed loudly, almost as if you could see their pursed lips – air forced through their invertebrate skeletons. All seemed pervasive, as if to target my children endlessly whilst they play. And I remember my paternal instinct kicking in, deciding that I must do something about these flies. Nasty flies. So in my efforts to learn more, I came across images of my enemy. Images like this one below: And looking closely, even as…

TUNA FISH: AN OVERVIEW

Bitten off More Small tin open like a fist is misleading. On the inside not a hair- bone bristles. Modern Ecology One day the housecats woke up enormous. Don’t know irony from goldfish said a large voice small-ly. The Melt The perfect union of lunch and sea, hot cheese stringing everything together. And the Cow will lie down with the Tuna Fish. Hello brother– one large stomach to another. Ballad of the Tuna from Snowy River It did not come from Snowy River or any river. No voice runs deep enough to sing this. Meanwhile in the Rowboat A silver…

I AM HDL. HEAR ME ROAR

Dear Diary, What a day. Things are crazy at work. I have so much to do. It seems that Al’s high blood pressure, his decades of eating poorly, not exercising, being stressed out, and smoking like a chimney, is soon going to catch up with him. The fact that both his mom and his dad died prematurely due to massive myocardial infarctions, not to mention that Al has diabetes and the metabolic syndrome, only make matters worse. He has ALL the major risk factors for atherosclerotic disease. I spent the last few days just floating around in Al’s blood, surveying…

I.D. ON THE STAND

A retelling of Kitzmiller vs. Dover Area School District,with apologies to Ernest L. Thayer The outlook wasn’t brilliant ‘neath that Pennsylvania sky: The courts stood N to zip before the new case here to try. Creationism in the schools had died a legal death, And now as Rothschild rose, Gishville IDers held their breath. The Pandas text was soon invoked in early draft. The I- D faithful clung to dogma calling evolution lie. They thought, “If only Behe could shore up this house of sand — We’d get it in the classroom yet, with Behe on the stand.” But Gillen…

COFFEE A LA MODE

Similar visually to the mandala images, these are cups of coffee vibrating at (top) and near (bottom) a normal mode frequency – coffee a la mode. The resonance phenomenon shown in these coffee cup images is similar to Cymatics and Chladni patterns on a circular plate. Although the lines in Chaladni figures are nodes, the bright areas in the coffee images are anti-nodes. (The coffee cups are vibrating at approximately 20Hz). These coffee images were created for a photo competition.

SONNETS FROM SPACE

I We sit, in love and gazing at the stars That fill the violet evening sky with sparks. What flies up there, besides our thoughts, or larks That sing life’s glory or its scars? Is there a being on a quest from Mars, And launching out in meteoric arcs? What answers would he seek when he embarks Across the void between his world and ours? We love each other, sitting two as one, And mostly, life is full with soothing sun, You hold me as we face the starry sky, To contemplate what comes and goes; and why. But sometimes,…

THE RNA TIE CLUB AND LESSONS TO BE LEARNED IN HOW TO WIN A NOBEL PRIZE

As of November 2005, 776 Nobel Prizes have been awarded (758 to individuals, 18 to organizations) in physics, chemistry, medicine, literature, peace, and economics. In that same month, according to the U.S. Bureau of Census, there were an estimated 6,469,818,677 people alive in the world. Consequently, the average person (or even the average scientist) has a very small chance of winning a Nobel Prize or even ever knowing anyone who has done so. However, there is a very small group of people whose odds of winning this estute award are exponentially increased. These people were the members of an elite…