(Evidence for FSM) ABSTRACT: Recent hurricane seasons have been characterized by intense and frequent tropical cyclones. One contributor is increased sea-surface temperature, which is caused by decreased upwelling of cold deep-ocean water. We demonstrate that decreased pirate activity results in less upwelling. This suggests that the only viable solution to intense tropical cyclones is to increase pirate activity. INTRODUCTION: The destructiveness of the 2004 and 2005 hurricane seasons has heightened public and scientific awareness of the possible long-term consequences of global warming. Although the link between hurricane strength and global warming remains speculative, recent work has shown that hurricanes have…
The Science Creative Quarterly
By jacobmichael
Jacob Haqq-Misra is a graduate student of meteorology and astrobiology at Penn State University with an unnatural affinity for random numbers. He also has an interest in the history and development of religion, and its interplay with the natural sciences. His current research activities include the effects of climate change on hurricane intensity, habitable zones around stars, and paleopiracy.
Michael Larson is a rising star in the realm of physics, and is currently engaged in full time indentured servitude at the University of Wyoming. Unfortunately, the nature of this schedule provides for little free time, which is squandered by poking fun at non-scientists in general. While his bad humor may not change the world, he takes solice in the fact that it has been known to make people physically ill.